Please reach out to your family you will be overwhelmed with how supportive they will be towards you.
I too have a very similar situation but its a very long story. Cut it short my partner hit crisis on Saturday but i knew then after me trying to help hom for a nearly 18.months that this time he again hadnt stopped and i had to think of myself for once and leave. Its completely shattered me we have a little girl 3yrs old and i have been trying to keep our family together. So you can imagine the heart break i found myself in when i had to walk away with her. I went to my brothers and told him and my sister in law everything i poured the last 18 months of upevil out onto the table and i have never felt such relief. My brother went to see my parnter who had finally hit crisis point, my brothrr and parnters mum intervene and now my parnter is in residential rehab, hitting crisis as probably saved us both in different ways. I dont think I can and dont know if i want to rebuild our relationship if he gets well, too much hurt has happened. I feel like i am grieveing and no idea what my future looks like however let me tell you that opening up to my family intially my brother and then my mum, uncle, nana and cousins (who are like siblings) as helped me a lot because i am no longer hiding this massive secret. I have also told a few close friends because i found i had started to isolate myself from my nearest and dearest. The support and understanding they have shown me has been overwhelming.
Please please if you can dig deep its very difficult but reach out you will be surprised.