Hi Ahurtwife,
So sorry to hear you’re going through this, especially with children to look after. If your husband isn’t willing to leave off of his own back after you’ve asked him to, it might be worth your while speaking to a solicitor to see what your options are? Sometimes a lawyers letter is all that’s needed. I’d probably change the locks and tell him his stuff is outside but I know that might cause a scene!
Not being allowed to ask questions in your marriage seems really disrespectful, as does him not putting your three kids first. I would definitely be trying to get him out the house so you can focus on you and your kids and having a bit of normality. If he works on himself and can find a way to be the support you need in your lives then great, but at the moment it doesn’t sound like he’s taken any steps to recovery and if he’s not even willing to talk about it, you can’t help him right now. He needs to sort this out himself.
Wishing you and your family all the best x