Bella what you’re going through sounds like emotional abuse and you don’t need to put up with this. There is no obligation on you to stand by someone while they treat you terribly. Good on him for getting sober, but if you aren’t happy with the person he is – and I can’t see anything in your posts to suggest there’s any happiness or reason to be together – I’d be getting him out the house and moving on with my life. You’ve likely already been through so much with his addiction, life is too short to be treated like that by someone who claims to love you.
I have a partner in recovery just now and if he was speaking to me like that there’s no way he would be anywhere near me. I would be having a serious conversation with your man to find out why he’s behaving like this, make it clear how it makes you feel, and if it continued he would be out and I wouldn’t look back. You deserve so much better than this x