So sorry you’re going through this Navy.
Please make sure you’re making time for you. Don’t sacrifice yourself for him. What he’s saying is completely unreasonable after what he’s done. I’ve kept my partner at arms length due to the trauma and sometimes he’ll try to rush back into affection and love and I just keep telling him it’s so different for him; I didn’t change, he changed. He’s done terrible things to me and the family and it’s so hard even wanting a cuddle from him after it all. You put up a barrier and you can’t just take it down when they feel like they’re doing better. It sounds like he’s a long way to go but please look after yourself and put yourself first x