Hi all thanks for the replies.
I just can’t seem to put my finger on why I keep going back to these horrible pills. On day 17 I went to pick up my antidepressant prescription, got home opened the bag and there they were… 3 boxes of codeine in with my sertraline, I hadn’t requested these I think the doctors were just so used to sending me them every month. I lasted maybe an hour before opening a pack and hated myself instantly. I’ve been taking them ever since. Today would of been day 41.
I hate myself. I hate that I can’t even stop taking them for the sake of my 3 beautiful kids. No one knows I’ve relapsed not even my own partner. I can’t deal with the shame. Most nights I go to sleep hoping I won’t wake up in the morning so I don’t have to live in this nightmare anymore.
I’m really struggling ????