I’m so sorry for what you’re going through.
I wish I could tell you there is a light, but there isn’t for everyone. Not everyone recovers. They need to want the help, they need to want to change. It doesn’t sound like your husband does right now and while that’s a real shame for him, you can’t help someone who isn’t going to help themselves. You can’t control him or change what he’s doing. You can only help yourself and protect yourself from this.
You need to put yourself first. Take back control of your life and your own happiness. It sounds so simple but I get that it’s so hard to let go. Realising I couldn’t control my partner’s actions and I could only protect myself from the chaos was the most important thing for me in healing from this. Mines is now doing really well, also at his Mums, but regardless of that he won’t be coming home until we’re both ready as he understands the damage he has done.
Wishing you all the best – you’re stronger than you think you are x