It definitely takes it toll on you mentally. I’ve had periods I was really struggling just to function, I have no idea how I’ve held down my job after the last 6 months if I’m honest!
He’s doing better now but the journey to this has been a rocky one. After I kicked him out, he was pretending to be going to meetings but actually was robbing our joint account to buy cocaine, he’s attempted suicide twice, been arrested, and now we have court looming over us. So I now know him doing well for a couple of months is not enough, it can all fall to pieces in an instant. But he is doing well now, seems to have a good mindset to move forward, and I’m getting stronger in myself. I threw myself into the gym for the stress relief and have been taking better care of me, putting myself first after so long putting him before everything. I would recommend doing anything you feel is an escape, that lets you take your mind off of things and makes you feel good, something for you and nobody else. The little things make a difference. And you have your kids to keep you going when all else fails 🙂
I think a meeting would be great and you might meet some good support there, I hope it goes well! I’ve been looking into meetings as I do think it would be good to meet people in a similar position. It’s hard talking to friends as they’re just horrified and don’t have a clue what to say, and I don’t blame them!! Keep us updated and I hope you find some peace and comfort soon – whether that’s with or without him x