Hello All,
this is my second post with a week or so haven’t gotten a reply back from the first one. I’m hurting so bad my husband was doing well sober for 3-4 months and then the past two days I have been questioning his appearance and how he’s been gas lighting me etc. and of course says I’m not high….well last night while we were in bed and he kept accusing me of messing around all while I was laying right next to him and he pushed me in the back and I lashed back and told him don’t touch me or put his hands on me. All night he was just talking crap, seeing and hearing things and accusing me of stuff etc. well today I find out he did aderall. I told him I can’t do it anymore and he’s says that I’m not going to leave he won’t let me etc. idk how much stronger I can be at this point I’m so tired like I have nothing left. He use to use meth and coke pretty bad and destroy things and mentally and emotionally and sometimes physically abuse me. I just don’t know anymore. I have offered to go with him and I showed him the celebrate recovery program that’s close by and he told me he was going to start but have yet to see it. Idk what gives! I have no one here where I live. All of my family are in Oklahoma. I thought about going to stay at the 30 day emergency shelter with my kids just to save enough to find a income based apartment so I don’t have to uproot them considering they are starting school tomorrow and they love their friends and school. Idk what to do anymore I feel like I’m losing myself in all the chaos