Hi mate, I hope you’re okay and thank you for sharing your story. Unfortunately it’s a story that so many of us know all too well. I myself, am a recovering cocaine addict and was once exactly where your partner was in many ways. From what you have shared it seems to me he is at a cross roads. He as you mentioned, shares with you when he has done it which is a huge positive but you may of fallen into a place where he feels there isn’t too many consequences of his actions. After the incident with the packet on the floor you made it clear you wasn’t happy and he took action which shows he does value your relationship and respects your wishes but cocaine is a sneaky drug that grips hold of a person and often cam take someone with the purest of hearts and make them do things tbey im a sober state would not. A little time has pasted and the dog house is behind him so he would think well I haven’t got on it in a while and I won’t be so stupid this time so there is no harm.
I think at this point the most important thing is clear honest communication. You need to set boundaries and make it clear what will happen if those boundaries are crossed. Equally, it’s really important that you ask him if there is deeper meaning to his use, if he is struggling with anything that may be effecting his head and also if he feels that it isn’t something he can control. If that is the case then, the most powerful tool for recovery is support. Support him and try establish a space that he feels comfortable to talk to you about things.
No body has ever chosen to become an addict, it isn’t something you wake up and day and say “you know what would be a great idea, I’m going to get bang on the gear and upset the Mrs and ruin my relationship” but it happens time and time again as I am an example of someone who lost the love of their life to addiction and no matter how much I wish I could, I can never go back and right the wrongs I put us through.
The people down the pub are not the people who will be there for you on your darkest day your partner and your family are. The night of fun on the gear with your pals is not worth a single second of a happy family life.
Talk to your partner tell him how you feel and let him know how it Is effecting you and as a team try to work out how you are going to get through it.
He is a lucky man to have someone in his life who cares about him still despite his struggles and I hope that together you can overcome this.
If he needs someone to talk to, I’m always on here and can talk to him too so he will know what will be waiting for him if he pushes you away due to cocaine.
I honestly wish you both the best
Stay strong, love eachother, support eachother and there is a better life waiting on the other side.
James x