Thanks so much for the reply… seeing these comments really gives me hope, I’m on day 10 today, I’m having bigger bouts of feeling normal and I’m managing to actually get decent sleeps which is good because I know that will really help my recovery.
I’d definitely agree with everyone who had said mornings are the worst, the utter doom and gloom and worry for the day ahead. Worrying how I’m going to feel.
At the minute as well I’ve got this worry that everyone around me is going to get bored of me still feeling like this, they’ve all been so supportive but every day I wake up and hope this is the day I’ll feel almost normal and I won’t have to tell people around me that I’ve got this horrible dread and anxiety in the pit of my stomach. And that I’m scared to be on my own with my own thoughts and anxieties.
To be honest I think I’m more worried at the moment because I feel like these moments of dread and anxiety are when I haven’t got anything to occupy me and because my partner works 10-6 and my girls go to school I feel like that’s why it’s so bad in the day time – I’m waiting around to get my girls at 3, all I can think about is getting further into the day but the time feels like it goes so slow.
I guess I’m just worried that even though I wasn’t aware of my addiction and I wasn’t using for the feeling that it was filling a void I already had. I would often feel at a loose end at times before I withdrew and I never used to have any motivation or energy.
I’m not sure if it’s normal to feel like this on day 10, so listless and unsure what to do with myself but I’m hoping it will improve. I’d like to say I want to be back to normal but I don’t think I remember what normal feels like. I’ve always struggled with my anxiety but it’s been a few years since it’s been like this so I guess I’m finding it hard to adjust.
My stomach is still a little dodgy but not to bad and I am managing to eat more which is good too.
I do think this may be a little longer road for me in regards to the mental journey as maybe some of the issues were already underlying. Also, the anti depressants I take may need rotating according to the doctors as I’ve been on them a while now.
Hoping everyone’s OK today x