Belle80: Yes, I think so. I’m thinking that I haven’t forgiven my husband either. He hid the coke addiction for about 5 years and it was about 35 years ago when he quit it. At that time, I decided that I wanted to give us a chance to see if we could leave it behind and be happy. We did and we have been happy. I never thought about it and we never talked about it. Until we did about five years ago and he confessed that he had cheated numerous times during those years. Added to all that he had put me through with it – I have been overwhelmed all over again. He has never been the way that he was during the coke years. I didn’t know that person. He was so different – all negatives. I just left it there. And, then it was in front of me again all the years later. I didn’t forgive him then, and I don’t think I can now. Not sure why. The betrayal is so great and it doesn’t make sense to me. I don’t understand any of it and I probably do not and never will know all of it. He has told me that he is embarrassed, ashamed, feels guilty, and remorseful. And, I believe that he is. But, we did leave it behind and found a way forward all those years ago. I believe that we can again.
