I’m so sorry this is happening to you, and sorry there’s been no reply until now, this forum goes very quiet at times, and certain threads disappear for a bit ????
If you read other posts on here you will see just how many of us spend so much time wondering how we can help our loved one overcome addiction and we give chance after chance , holding onto hope things will change…. .sometimes they do but it’s a long journey and in the meantime we have to take care of ourselves
I hope you are looking after you , all this trauma impacts us more than we realise until one day we get very sick and realise , often with regret , that we forgot to take care of ourselves .. im in that awful place right now. I’m reaching out now for counselling to try and understand myself better as to why I have never kept boundaries and looked after myself. I was one of those who never thought any of this would ever happen to me . I now have 3 different life limiting illnesses, at least one of which I am sure was caused by the trauma of last 5 years , and all 3 exsacerbated by it
So PLEASE look after yourself , reach out to friends and family if you can , speak to your GP /counselling services if haven’t already… And do something nice every single day for YOU .
Wishing you all the best, and get to read this and to know you are not alone Xx