Hi Gary,
Very similiar story to ours. I found out who hes dealers are, son self harmimg and having delusions…seeing an imaginary figure telling him to hurt himself. Im convinced its the weed and cocaine. He is receiving professional help from a drugs counncellor. When i found cannabis in his room i phoned the police, They were fantastic and interviewed him with a drug councellor present. He wont get a criminal record unless he re-offends. I have taken his wages off him, shopped him to the police. But things have started to get better recently. That happened when my wife and I backed off and stopped trying to make him stop and controlling his life. As hard as it was I took the view that its his life, his choices, we would always love him, provide food and shelter. But the help stops there until he says he wants help to change for the better. No financial help. he brought drugs into the home so Police were called. He had a choice. If he didnt like living here under our rules he knew where the front door was !! if he left we weren’t kicking him out. Up until then we cried begged shouted and threatened but to no avail, especially with all the broken promises. Just recently he bought a TV for himself from the money he would have normally spent on drugs, a good sign that he made the right choice. He has ownership of the problem he has to take ownership of the solution. Love him, do not support him financially, be there for him when he is ready. While youre fighting for him he will continue to abuse himself and you. Back off and pray that one day he will come back to you. Early days at the moment but we have had a good week and our son is looking better and theres a glimmer of his old self. Dont know how long it will last. Good luck to you
