No you don’t have to put up with that behaviour, no it’s not your fault and yes you need to put yourself first. I think it’s best to have a really open discussion about where this life is leading you and where you want it to be. You have a choice and the choices you make will have consequences but being dragged down by your partners issues isn’t fair and unless he is prepared to acknowledge a problem and address it by seeking help then there really isn’t much you can do to help. Unfortunately there isn’t a magic wand you can wave to just fix a person but you can choose whether you spend any more energy trying to fix them or focus on yourself. It’s not selfish to want to be happy even if that means sacrificing a relationship. I wish it was simple and that I could take my own advice but my husband has acknowledged his alcoholism and wants to get help but I have told him I haven’t made any decisions about staying with him or not and will not be rushed to do so, so we are in limbo at the moment. You do have a choice, a relationship shouldn’t feel like a prison sentence and you shouldn’t feel guilty about putting yourself and your children first x
