Oh Gem I am sorry you are going through this – its tough when somebody you love is an addict – for me it is my son :'(
what you have to remember is whenever he is abusing a substance he will also be lying to you and will say what ever he thinks you want to hear or what ever he has to in order to manipulate you into doing what he wants!
Addiction is an illness and the addict is not the person you fell in love with….. while you may feel you have a duty of care to him because you are all he has got – there is a reason you are all he has got!
You also have to remember that you have a duty of care not only to yourself but to your children and you have to put you and them way before him …..because he wont will abusing he will always put himself first.
You need to stay strong – i know how hard it is – i had to put my son in rehab when he was 15 years old and he has been on and off the substance abuse wagon ever since – right now he is clean (but only for 7 weeks) and when he is clean he is the loveliest person you could meet – when he is abusing he is the worst person you could meet :'(
I cannot walk away from him because he is my son – he is my responsibility – this man is not yours! I hope you can find the strength to protect you and your family from any more pain he may cause xx