17 year old son and weed

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    • #5742
      fionag66
      Participant

      Just after some advice or light at the end of the tunnel.

      He was diagnosed with anxiety and depression around 3 years ago this was around the same time he regularly started using cannabis . He missed the whole of year 11 and only got 3 gcses . Sat them at home.

      He’s had a part-time job for several months really wants to go to college and get a good job but he says it’s anxiety holding him back.

      He lacks motivation says weed helps him but gets angry with me when I don’t give him money for it last few weeks we have had really bad argument with my partner squaring up to him which is totally out of character and then yesterday day he has argued with me me which he does frequently and bruised my hand and call me a bad mother alongside a lot of other names and I just snapped and drove him to his dad’s 80 miles away.

      This is hard for me and it is something I have never done and his dad is useless anyway I need help I really don’t know so what to do for the best but things can’t carry on with him smoking weed being lazy see and not having the confidence in himself that he can do so much better.

    • #16302
      danman83
      Participant

      Hiya fiona, I was really bad on weed from about 14 to 19. I’m 36 now and don’t touch the stuff. I literally had it every day for 5 years. I messed my gcses up, and didn’t go school for the last 6 month. I regret it a whole lot, even though I had the best teenage years. I regret having it.

      I was a nightmare for my mum and dad. Punching holes in doors and walls at home. And having a bad temper I put it down to being a teenager which part of it is. The anxiety and that with your son is like me, but the weed makes it a load worse, you think it’s better with it – but it’s not.

      It makes you really angry if you can’t have it. I could tell you some things I did.. but I’ll be here all day lol.

      Mixing weed and being a hormonal kid isn’t a good combination at all.

      Now.. this is how I stopped.. firstly I got to the point where I had enough of it. My life was boring, it was bad for my chest. I had a lot of regrets. I could only get a crap wage job. I’m in a great job now though.

      Your son must want to stop it before anything. I started to do weights at home and that helped me a lot. Then i wanted to go in the army, and i needed 6 months to be clean. So this was my target, and it worked. But I never got in the army for health reasons. But i was clean from it and happy.

      Sometimes we’re just stuck in the same shitty routine day in day out, and your brain gets use to it. So I took up weights and running and felt a lot better and refreshing. Just try and have a quiet talk with him and try and push him in the right direction. He can still turn his life around tell him, and he will regret it like I did.

      Everything is hard the 1st time – like college and starting new things, people are afraid of change. But it will get better for him.

      • #16303
        fionag66
        Participant

        Thank you for your message. It makes so much sense. Would you mind if I let him read it ? Thank you again for sharing your story and I’m glad to hear you’re in a good place now. Fiona

    • #16304
      danman83
      Participant

      No of course not. I was going to say , share it with him. Because kids tend not listen to there parents. It stops you from doing so many things and socialising. And this will be a big part in his anxiety. Or could of even caused it. But I don’t know the times of when his anxiety started and his using.

      But if I was his age again.id cut my friends off – the using friends, and I would go to college and learn a plumbing course or something. Or get my gcses then go from there. He still has the time to do all this and have a great future. Good luck.

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