6 year addiction I just need to talk

This is the first time I’ve ever wrote anything on the internet I don’t use any social media . I suffer with epilepsy, chronic migraine, inflammatory bowel disorder and was mentally abused for 14 years by my wife.after 8 years I started to drink and take cocaine, I was empty on the inside but had to be strong on the outside because I have 3 amazing kids that i couldn’t leave that is why I stayed. I thought I could stand the abuse until my kids were old enough that it wouldn’t have as been as bad on them when I moved out.but I couldn’t stand my live and I made the biggest mistake off my life by turning to cocaine to try to make myself feel better happy . 5 years later and I finally had the courage to leave her I got Myself a flat and got myself down to a point where I only spent 40pw but I crashed when my mum passed away and i it heavy again.and now im in a worse situation every time I try to stop she starts buying it for me. I try to say no try to stick to the plan I have for stopping but when your an addict and gets given drugs for free I don’t have the mental strength to say no. I’ve been to the doctor and he sent me to A.D.S and after 4 sessions off them telling me how much damage it does too me I was told I didn’t need to go back again. And I’m still in the same position but I want off this I don’t know who to turn to for help because if a doctor puts me on a 4 week counsel course and thinks everything will be ok well its not I went bk to docs and said I need more help and was told the only thing he could do was send me A.D.S again, is that the only help out there?