[fifi65]

Hi It’s soul destroying this kind of life!! I know exactly how you’re feeling.. I have done all that over the years put him out and then had to ask him back because Ive been out of my mind with worry, its such a vicious circle. Have you got anyone to support you? I hope so x I tell debt collectors and the likes my son doesnt live here anymore and I dont have a forwarding address as my relationship with him has broke down. Could you talk to your doctor? They normally say there are no magic pills for us heartbroken mum’s but it might be worth a visit take care, you’re not on your own fiona xx

[sad-and-tired]

Thank you, he is back once again, I had a talk to him yesterday, not sure how much good it will do though…..but at least I know where he is and if he is eating. He tells me I am paranoid, but then he would wouldn’t he. I can already see that he is prioritising his own needs rather than paying his bills, I have recently got him up to date with everything again. This time I will leave his finances and what happens will happen……xxx

[patricia]

Hi is Patricia, my e-mail address is: pattie53@live.co.uk take care all you mums xx

[patricia]

Hello ‘sad and tired’ My son is exactly the same, sounds as tho he is a clone of your son!! The ‘drug’ problem with my son has been going on since he was 15 years of age, he is now 30, so its been a long long time. The problem of course has been my son but I see now one other problem has been me…Mum!! I constantly gave in through the years foolishly thinking it would be the answer but of course that was NOT the answer. I paid his bills, bought food and clothed him and paid any debts. It doesnt work!! He is my son but he’s now like a blood sucking leech and if I sat down and tried to count just how much I have given him in the past 10 years I dread to think what it would amount to……thousands I think!! And Im not well off. I should have turned away from him years n years ago. Lots of folk have said to me “HE has to reach rock bottom first before recovery can take place” and I never allowed him to reach that rock bottom so he’s always been protected. If you can be strong, let your son reach that rock bottom and dont you be there with the great big strong safety net. Its amazing just how they finally find strength and somehow manage to survive!! I’ve taken the ‘safety net’ i.e. my cash, away from my son, did it recently and guess what……..it appears to be working!! He is suddenly becoming ‘slightly more’ responsible AND asking how I am today! Take care, is a long journey but hopefully you’ll get there xxxxx

[patricia]

Hello ‘sad and tired’ My son is exactly the same, sounds as tho he is a clone of your son!! The ‘drug’ problem with my son has been going on since he was 15 years of age, he is now 30, so its been a long long time. The problem of course has been my son but I see now one other problem has been me…Mum!! I constantly gave in through the years foolishly thinking it would be the answer but of course that was NOT the answer. I paid his bills, bought food and clothed him and paid any debts. It doesnt work!! He is my son but he’s now like a blood sucking leech and if I sat down and tried to count just how much I have given him in the past 10 years I dread to think what it would amount to……thousands I think!! And Im not well off. I should have turned away from him years n years ago. Lots of folk have said to me “HE has to reach rock bottom first before recovery can take place” and I never allowed him to reach that rock bottom so he’s always been protected. If you can be strong, let your son reach that rock bottom and dont you be there with the great big strong safety net. Its amazing just how they finally find strength and somehow manage to survive!! I’ve taken the ‘safety net’ i.e. my cash, away from my son, did it recently and guess what……..it appears to be working!! He is suddenly becoming ‘slightly more’ responsible AND asking how I am today! Take care, is a long journey but hopefully you’ll get there xxxxx

[patricia]

Hello ‘sad and tired’ My son is exactly the same, sounds as tho he is a clone of your son!! The ‘drug’ problem with my son has been going on since he was 15 years of age, he is now 30, so its been a long long time. The problem of course has been my son but I see now one other problem has been me…Mum!! I constantly gave in through the years foolishly thinking it would be the answer but of course that was NOT the answer. I paid his bills, bought food and clothed him and paid any debts. It doesnt work!! He is my son but he’s now like a blood sucking leech and if I sat down and tried to count just how much I have given him in the past 10 years I dread to think what it would amount to……thousands I think!! And Im not well off. I should have turned away from him years n years ago. Lots of folk have said to me “HE has to reach rock bottom first before recovery can take place” and I never allowed him to reach that rock bottom so he’s always been protected. If you can be strong, let your son reach that rock bottom and dont you be there with the great big strong safety net. Its amazing just how they finally find strength and somehow manage to survive!! I’ve taken the ‘safety net’ i.e. my cash, away from my son, did it recently and guess what……..it appears to be working!! He is suddenly becoming ‘slightly more’ responsible AND asking how I am today! Take care, is a long journey but hopefully you’ll get there xxxxx

[sad-and-tired]

Thanks Patricia, I will email you if that’s ok xx

[sad-and-tired]

well after everything I have said, I have done it again. He was a day away from losing his car insurance and his job, he begged me to help him with bills. promised he would stay in at night, leave his account alone, go and get help for his problem. So I helped him and at midnight he has gone out, to mcdonalds he says……. I am so angry with myself I must be the worlds biggest mug…….I cant even begin to imagine what the hell he is up to, but I don’t think I can do this much longer, it is the lies and deceit as much as anything, he just doesn’t seem to be able to help himself…….

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