[brook8696]

My husband has been asked to leave the family home after a 4 year perpetual cycle of him taking cocaine, sometimes having pschycotic episodes, he leaves for a week after his drug taking, goes to his mums, comes home convinces me he will change and the whole thing starts again.

He committed to going to a day centre for rehab and went for two weeks everything was great I had my old husband back until, he had to go back to work to earn money as he owns his own business. I set boundaries and said if he takes drugs again then he leaves for good and goes into proper residential rehab. he was ok for 1 week then he came home last Saturday afternoon having taking drugs, it was obvious to see (he thinks I know he has taken drugs because I’ve followed him which is ridiculous) I know because I have eyes!

I packed his bags and took them to his mums saying he wasn’t allowed back, he came home on Monday, pshycotic this time telling me that he had been having me followed and that he knows I’ve been having numerous affairs, again absolutely ludicrous. All I’ve done is stand by him and try to get him better. I asked him to leave which he eventually did after our 20 year old daughter broke down and cried in front of him begging him to go.

He has accused me of turning everyone against him and says I am playing god with his life by throwing him out, he called me today crying telling me I am an evil woman for what I’ve done to him and I’ve taken everything away from him.

Please tell me I’ve done the right thing? I nearly caved when he was up set and said come home but I’m going to stick to my guns. It’s so hard watching the person you love who was once a loving, caring strong man turn into a drug addict who doesn’t seem to see what pain he is causing everyone. Blaming everyone else apart from the root of the cause and that’s his taking drugs

[ah91]

My boyfriends a cocaine addict and I’ve been told that they need to really hit rock bottom and lose things to realise they need help. They’ve got to want it. I struggled with my boyfriend for over a year, What you’ve done in my eyes is give him the push he needs!

I manage his finances, no cash nothing. I have been told that macadamia nuts and liquorice together works reduces the craving. Even though he’s out of the house still love him and don’t give up. I’m glad I didn’t I’ve seen a massive change in mine xx

[tigerbabby78]

What a terrible time for you. Unfortunately he will say such things as he clearly has not accepted he has a problem. He is responsible for his drug use not you, stay strong.

[sutts]

My boyfriend’s a heroin addict and exactly the same, accusations, totally unreasonable and selfish but then the same thing has a meltdown (I’ve actually just posted my first feed). I’ve tried being kind…He takes kindness for weakness, ive tried understanding…He takes that as green light to get gear so now tough love is the last and only option?xx

[ah91]

Give him Tough love! I was lied to for over a year by him and his mum about his addiction. I was always the one giving him tough love while his mum bailed him out.. it made it worse. I now do it my own way. Over 3 weeks ago he relapsed and gave his mum an excuse as to why he needed the money and she gave it to him because she thought he was going to get hurt. I told her not to how is someone suppose to stop if they know someone is going to always bail them out? They aren’t. It’s been 2 weeks now and he’s not touched it. Doesn’t sound a lot I know but being an addict for over 10 years and doing it every week I’m very proud of him.

There is nothing wrong with tough love because you’re doing it for him and his life. X

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