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Am I imagining it?
Hubby had a major cocaine problem that ended with us separating for 3 years although we continued to be together during that time. He turned his life around, has an amazing job, is a wonderful dad and husband except….the past couple of months he’s started to withdraw from me, sleeps in another room, if he’s not at work he’s asleep, no sex drive, EXTREME mood swings, and drinking a little too much a little too often. Then I noticed in the spare room he’s torn rectangles of paper off of letters….my guess is they’re being used to roll up and sniff cocaine? A couple of weeks ago I thought his eyes looked funny, and he had a really runny nose a couple of times. Am I being paranoid? I’ve ordered cocaine wipes that’ll be here today so I can go over the shelves etc in the spare room like I’m some sort of detective. Feels like I’m going crazy!?!?!
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You are not being paranoid: he is having a relapse. In this times, nothing you can do for him, but everything you can do for yourself: keep distance from him (live somewhere else); if you want, text him and say that you will be ready for a chat about the situation once he’s sober; talk to your friends and family about how you feel – if necessary, speak to a professional (GP/Counsellor/ Therapist…).
Once he is out of relapse – which could take anything between a week to several weeks – encourage him to talk about what the trigger was and to also book an appointment with his GP to discuss about it and maybe get onto antidepressants. If he refuses, you need to consider that this probably happen again soon with all the urges and the brain alterations he went through.
Stay strong and think of your well-being first as it is crucial if you want to avoid being damaged by this.
Courage!!
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You are not crazy. I ignored my gut feelings for months and they were never wrong. I hope the best for you and I hope he can be honest with you
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This is exactly how my husband makes me feel .. like I’m going crazy. The sniffing, snoring, heavy breathing, sweating and sneaking around. He thinks I’m stupid… I now know I’m not… I was just in love, naive and maybe didn’t want to believe it.
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