[huddle]

Just thought I’d update …. my son was beaten up last Monday. Saw him Tues at my daughter’s. He looked wretched. Thin, black eye , sore ribs he said. Filthy clothes. Told us he had got a food bank voucher & got food but no gas, no electricity in his flat, no TV (that belonged to the landlord & he sold it for drugs money). He was shuffling around my daughter’s house, head bowed looking like an old tramp. We all lavished him with tea and sympathy. I took him back to my house, let him shower & gave him a large hot meal. He left to go back to his flat promising me he would call again Weds, Thurs or tonight after he had rested and seen his GP.

Well Weds he was seen begging around the smarter area of town and he hasn’t visited. The smarter side of town is a good 1.5 miles from his flat. Sounds like he’s hoodwinked us again & give back to the lifestyle he loves. I even spoke to a nurse over the phone at our local drug support unit requesting a home visit as a welfare check but they said “No”. My son has got to go to them to be re-assessed and she said he clearly doesn’t want to. He was supposed to go to them each week after his discharge from his last rehab but rather than carry on looking & sounding great he then relapsed with an almighty thud until we are now here with him putting up“the finger” to his family, his med team and key workers & preferring to spend each day hungry, unkept, unwashed, not caring about his flat, his family or anything else & preferring spending his waking hours stoned, high or whatever the feeling he achieved through drug use.

We his family have been told, read & researched that nothing will change unless he decides its time to get the help he needs so we wait and worry and cry and try to stay strong for him and for each other. It’s just so dreadful and heartbreaking.

[danman83]

Hope your ok.. but he really does need want to do it for himself. I bet it is heartbreaking watching your son like this. No one wants that happen to there children. Can he go to rehab if he wants to?

[huddle]

Yes if he shows commitment, cuts down on use etc etc – seems like too big an ask sadly. Another week. Another broken promise to come and see us. Just seems to his little family he prefers the life he has – driven by drugs 24/7, such is the power of drug addiction. Christmas on the way (last year he didn’t share it with his family, an empty seat at the Xmas dinner table) but this year I’ve decided will be all about caring for the family I have and especially my darling grandson who is 6 in November. Very very tough and I feel for all families of addicts for what should be happy family time. Ty Danman83- I’m happy you got in touch. So kind.

[danman83]

My mate is bad on heroin and is really not looking good. But he told me he avoids everyone because he doesnt want people to see him like this. It could be that as well.

When hes ready hopefully he will come round. Ive read a book on 1 guy who was a coke addict for 24 year and is 11 year clean now.. and he lost everything. Some people have to really hit rock bottom or lose someone to realise. Hope your ok anyway.

[huddle]

Yes Danman83 I’m ok. Ty for your wise words. He’s just called to see me. Didn’t look too bad and says he is waiting for a call to tell him bed is ready at rehab centre. He sounded very positive about it and says “I’m ready Mum”. Proof of the pudding ….so we’ll see. I’m crossing all my fingers toes etc!

[danman83]

Well at least its a start. But when he comes out he needs just stay away from everyone really who he knows,who does drugs. Hope it goes well for you.

[icarus-trust]

So sorry to hear about your son. It really must be heartbreaking for you. Fingers crossed for the rehab.

Just a reminder that our charity could offer you support if you feel it would be helpful.

You can contact Icarus Trust on help@icarustrust.org or visit our website http://www.icarustrust.org

Good luck with everything.

[Author]

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