[sweet-pea]

My husband is an alcoholic. I did realise there was a problem when we married but like most who love our addicts, I was in denial. He openly admitted he liked a drink and it was th enculturation were he worked, but this has now escalated and I am wanting to leave him.

He survived cancer and despite all my “ moaning” and discussions trying to get him to minimise his drinking, it has gone to far for me to cope. I emailed his consultant last week and told me there is a phenomena where survivors think they’re invincible… I think my husband is just a drunk.

He has 2 adult children and so do I. None of them live with us anymore, but they are all aware of his habit. Since they have left, over the last year, the problems have magnified.

We have talked many times, as the deterioration of our relationship erodes. He said 2 weeks ago, as we aim to diet, that he will cut down, but as this weekend has escalated… and after he’d knocked back beer and wine, the brandy showed up. After half a bottle, he had gone too far and an argument pursued…

I’ve had enough of being treated like this and want to leave… but he is manipulative and controlling.

We have a house together, he runs his business, surprisingly, successful, but over the last 6 months, I have fallen out of love. Some days I don’t even like him anymore and those are becoming increasingly more frequent.

I need advice and guidance on how to withdraw from this situation. I am strong enough to leave, this is both our second marriage, but it’s the manipulation and retaliation that I’m going to need support, as he will blame me for not standing by him, but I no longer want the drama and arguments.

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