[harmony]

My partner was an ex heroin addict but clean for around 12 years of the ten we are together. But in those ten years I struggle to make sense of see saw of his behaviour. I want to understand better in order to help. He can have periods of his live moving forward positively and he has cried with happiness at going from homeless addict to self employed own business luving with me . But then can get very low, stays in bed, let’s down customers and becomes hostile, distant. This often coincides with falling into cannabis use which I object to. He admits when free of it he loses motivation and just obsessed about a joint. I have tries to figure out triggers sometimes there are sometimes not. A month ago he was evangelical about having harms of cannabis, had renewed contact with estranged family and a busy work diary. Out of the blue back to lying in bed claiming a bad back, and a week later i discovered back on weed. As usual I told him to leave which he did, more resentful of no weed than leaving. After a few days he promised to get help, could not explain it and has cut down drastically. His family contact is by phone as they live too far away. When he has run out of cannabis before he describes it as his “head coming off” even after a short time using. Once he was so disturbing and angry I fled my home. He says the urge to use builds and builds. In other ways he seems prone to mood swings, very little gets him up and very little brings him down. He is on anti depressants as he felt suicidal due to his inability to quit. When he begins smoking there is a brief honeymoon of productivity but after a week flat then runs out of money and angry. Does anyone think something else adhd or bipolar is at root of this?

[icarus-trust]

Hi Harmony,

Thanks for posting. I can understand how hard it is for you to understand and cope with your partner’s behaviour and mood swings. This must make things difficult for you.

If you would like some support for yourself please contact us at The Icarus Trust. We are a charity that provides support for people who are dealing with the impact of a partners addiction. Maybe talking to one of our experienced, trained people would help answer some of your questions.

You can contact Icarus Trust on help@icarustrust.org or visit our website http://www.icarustrust.org

All the best.

[Author]

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