[franticmum]

im really struggling at the moment, I cant see an end to this terrible time, this has got to be the worse of all the times in the past, just when things were starting to get better and i really thought the future was looking cautiously brighter it all came crashing down, all due to that evil drug heroin, my son has reverted back big time, all his savings have gone, he has lost his flat and most of his possessions, he has lied and stolen from me, I just dont know what to do, my other son has just become a daddy to a beautiful baby girl and all the joy and pleasure is wiped out by the antics of my older son, he has not even acknowledged the new addition, but seems very jealous saying that all im bothered about is the new baby, he has jeered and been really vicious and says he is better off with his “friends” as they care about him and help him get what he wants (his next fix) he was rushed into hospital yet again the blood clot in his leg is worse he was supposed to be having warfarin injections daily but has missed 8 appointments, he has been told he could end up losing his leg or even die if the clot breaks but he wont listen, and discharged himself tonight and now no one knows where he is.
Im rambling on again but i feel so alone and cant stop crying, is this going to be the end? what can I do to stop this downward spiral, why oh why is he doing this, I know nobody has any solutions or answers and i think this is why it is so hard to bear, im his mum and I cant make him better,

[sdiggle]

I wish I had the answer for you like I wish you had the answer for me, im sick of everyone telling me to go leave him but its not that easy not when you love them, it takes strength to walk away I dont have it yet I hope you get yours soon, I really do becsuse I know how much your hurting , xx

[fifi65]

Thinking of you ladies to-night, I don’t often pray but im going to and i’ll add you in them xx

[Author]

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