[danman83]

Im so sorry to hear this. Hes done well to quit it for a while with good help. Im suprised he got worse.

Im doing my best to quit coke i hate the stuff i have lapsed afew times this year. I have it about once a month. And i wish i never touched it.

Thanks for sharing your story. I hope your brothers sorts himself out.

[len]

Danman83

Can I please have some of your experiences, my partner is a recovering coke addict and I feel sometimes because I love him so I tend to just take he’s word for thing in the effects of it and what not.

Can u tell me what u go through before a relapse at all? That’s where we r still struggling he will go upto 8 weeks clean then relapse but I need to hear from someone else if possible what goes through your mind before u do actually relapse

Thank you

[danman83]

Yes course.. if he is lapsing say every 2 month. For a start hes doing good. I quit at new year.. didnt touch for 2 month. And my gf said we been invited to a party.. i said plz can we not go and you just stay in with me i dont want get coke.. she said i be fine.. and i got it… i was gutted..

Anyways .. if hes hitting 2 month and hes lapsing.. he must be thinking a few things .. that hes ok now and he can go past these trigger points.. eg.. driving past were he use pick drugs up.. he can have a drink now.. he can go to friends and not use while they use.

The fact is.. 2 and 3 month is a sneaky stage of lapse.. it creeps up on you and your brain is playing games with you making it ok to get it.

My advice is coming up to 6 week..mainly the week he normally lapses.. is he needs to up alertness if you get me. He knows whats coming. May be do a plan for the next 2 week of hobbies or something. Each day write things.. go for walk… meal.. gym.. a book.. decorate..

He and you both know its coming. Hes not going to be ok for another year.. may be longer.. so no matter what.. he is not ok at 8 week if he thinks he is. He needs not to drink any alcohol at all. This is a main trigger.

And you support him as much as he can. If he goes out with friends on that 8 week mark. Say no you are not.

Have you watched louise clarke on you tube on crack cocaine part 123.. get them watched you will learn alot.. and she explains what happens at the 2 month mark and what to do.

Feel free to ask me anything

[len]

Ok so he don’t drink anymore for that reason has had 2 beers since Xmas but the hard part is he is a delivery driver for a supermarket so regularly has to drive in that area.

I have never judged or rowed with him after a relapse I listen and I try to understand, I have stopped him going out a few times also for this reason. We thought maybe if he had a reminder of what he had if he felt a relapse coming it would help so we put a happy family photo as he’s screen saver so that’s what he saw as he went to call dealer but that didn’t work either.

He is coming up to 4 weeks clean again and I can’t help but worry x

[danman83]

Does he use when soba aswell? My opinion from myself.. its hard to explain really.. if ive got my mind set on getting it i will..

If the problem is driving in the area.. maybe look for another job.. i have in the past told dealers. Stop selling it to me it makes me suicidal.. some have. Some havent.

I could have a fam photo but that wouldnt stop.. do you know whats great tho.. tell him download castbox. And theres loads of podcast to listen to.. tell him listen to the alan charles show.. theres about 50 eps so far. He was a coke addict for 24 year! And how he got through it all is amazing. And it helps a great deal listening to people who are a lot worse and how they beat it.. russel brand is on there and he talks about his.

Theres a thing called the 3 Ds.. delay.. distract . Do… so if he gets cravings.. tell himself delay it for 30 mins… distract. Distract it with walking the dog..read a book.. tidy up.. walk.. anything.. and then act on it and do it. This is because cravings last 30 mins..

On a positive note tho.. he is trying . And hes lapsing 6 times ayear. Which isnt every week.

You know and he knows when its happening. Take his money off him at 7 weeks or something.

But just make sure he is only lapsing as he says. We do lie about it lol.

[len]

Yeah mostly when sober tbh.

He sticks to the same dealer mostly who I spoke to and told him that he was killing himself after overdosing and spending the weekend in the hospital he swore he wouldn’t deal to him again but to them it’s a business they couldn’t care less

I have control of all he’s wages now but he’s dealer will give him upto £300 tick so u don’t find out he has relapsed until it needs paying like NOW!

But and he is really good with it and understands I need to have my mind at rest if he is getting a cold or don’t have much of an appetite I do piss test him weekly.

On another note I do have a personal question I’d rather not put on here and know we can’t put phone numbers or anything out so is there another way of me asking u privately do u know?

[danman83]

My email [EMAIL DELETED]

[len]

Emailed u, thank you

[danman83]

Or they delete them quik.. so if you give me a time and a day. Il put it on then you check then lol. Ill check this everyday now lol

[codeine14years]

Sorry posted a message on the wrong thread, couldn’t see an option to delete, so edited my message to this.

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