[katiebell]

I have found this page as I lie in bed crying because my husband is drunk again ! I can’t remember the last time he didn’t drink ! It’s every evening but the time is getting earlier by the day . My husband is a fantastic dad and hard working etc but that goes as soon as he’s drank enough , averaging 2-2&1/2 bottles a night . I am so desperate for him to see what he’s like :- being sick I ln his sleep , aggressive, sleep walking etc , my 3 kids see this but I fear they are ‘use to it ‘ I’m trying so hard to protect them and for them to still respect there dad but what example is this ? With the current situation I can’t even escape to a family members house , I just want the strength to take control , he’s seen the GP who recommended counselling but he wouldn’t go.

Sorry if this is a ramble ! Any advice would be great x

[j33]

My dad was an alcoholic since I was a kid, I’m now in my late 20’s. It’s all I’ve ever known and grown up with. He would never change, you just can’t help some people who doesn’t wish to be helped. Although, I am not saying this is the case here but there is great difficulty when accepting and doing what’s right for yourself and your family. But I believe if it is early days, early intervention would be a huge help. There are special alcohol clinics available (free on the NHS, or if you go private, the waiting time can be reduced) and even counselling for yourself should be suggested also. It is clearly causing you pain, addiction takes a toll on the whole family, not just the drinker.

Al-anon ( https://www.al-anonuk.org.uk/) is a great charity and can provide a helpline, especially during covid-19.

[magicmike]

My Mom was a Alcoholic when I was young, I have now for the last 15 years used Cocaine and gradually increased from beer to full out booze…. I can function and hold a great job….. Although I fucking hate it and I wish I could stop….. I know my wife is feeling the same as you…. I seriously want to hold her again and say everything will be fine it kills me and I don’t show it…… My whole family Grandparents Mom Dad Sister Friends have all passed it kills me, I cry a lot I feel pain…. I drink and do drugs regularly…. I hate myself for it……. My wife dosent deserve this life, what’s an excuse….. my lose of loved ones….there’s no excuse…. I hide booze and drugs everywhere and I’m sure my wife knows as well I’m sure you know, I feel like a piece of shit most days…..I’m sure your husband feels the same….. There’s a time to stay and a time to go…….. Nobody needs to live through the bullshit an alcoholic puts family through…. As much as I love my wife, if she left me…… I believe I would seek treatment, she deserves a better life…… It’s hard to break habits…… There’s a pot of gold on the other side, you can’t help him nobody can….. when he’s ready to sober up it means total change….. as heartbreaking as it is, try to be civil and continue to love…

[icarus-trust]

Hi Katiebell,

I’m really sorry to read your post and know how extra difficult this is for you in these lockdown times.

I’m glad that you’ve found this site which gives lots of support but if you would like some more please contact us at The Icarus Trust. We are a charity that offers support for people having to cope with a partner’s addiction. We have people called Family Friends who are trained and very experienced. If you get in touch I can put you in contact with one of them. Talking with someone who understands what you are dealing with might help you not to feel alone and may help to find a way forward.

You can contact Icarus Trust on help@icarustrust.org or visit our website http://www.icarustrust.org

Hoping that this is helpful. All the best to you.

[katiebell]

Thank you

[Author]

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