[maggie]

i don’t know where to begin really – my story started about 12 years ago I reckon. My son is 28 now. I think he started smoking cannabis when he was 16/17 and started work/ an apprenticeship as was earning money. For the first year he was doing really well and the company gave him excellent reports. However in the 2nd year he started missing college and not going to work some days, I don’t know where he was going! After several warnings he got the sack. Over the years he managed to get jobs and hold them down for a couple of years or so until the last 18 months. He has been evicted from 2 flats in 4 years, the last one in May because his flat was raided and he was arrested for possession of cannabis. He stayed with a friend for several weeks but then went to a night shelter, however he could only stay for 28 days and as from yesterday is on the streets. He is in debt due to drugs. I have paid off a dealer as he was threatened with a bullet but can’t keep on. I have never been in debt and my husband, his Dad, won’t have him back home to live with us as we don’t want Police, debt collectors, dealers etc knocking on our door. I met him yesterday and got him a meal etc and felt dreadful leaving him in town, 20 miles away where he has been staying but there was nothing I could do. He kept texting begging me to let him come home and I’m heartbroken but every time I try and help him by finding him a job and a home he just messes up as can’t get up and get there in time. We have always worked and paid our way and brought him up that way but drugs have changed him so much and made him aggressive and thinks he is above the law. My husband is 74 and doesn’t need all this hassle. I bottle it up and put a brave face on things as I feel guilty and so ashamed. I just don’t know what to do. Are there other parents out there who have been in a similar situation and can give any advice please.

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