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Hi this is the first time I have posted anything like this my bf has suffered depression pretty much most of his life we met 15 months ago and not long after we met he told me all about himself which was hard for him but We got close pretty quick and he trusted me enough to tell me everything about his past and his depression after 3 months of being together he moved in with me we sorted all his debts out together as he was a heavy drinker he then got himself back into work and things couldn’t of been better then 8 months ago things started getting a bit rocky with are relationship I knew something was wrong he just kept blaming his depression I stood by him and supported him to cut a long story short I have just found out he is using cocaine I am in turmoil I approached him a couple of days ago we need to talk and sort things out he keeps putting it of and I don’t want to push him due to his mental health I don’t know what to do would be grateful for anyone’s advice thanks
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Hi sorry to hear about your boyfriends depression problem but as I’m in a bit of a hurry so I won’t chat too much about it … all I want to say to you cocaine is the biggest downer that brings on depression.
Not all cocaine users come clean about it to their partners and it could well be that he was using cocaine before he shared his depression problem to you.
My partner has been a cocaine addict since his teens and now in his mid 30’s and Iv been with him 6 years now and only found 2 years ago he is a cocaine user.
He was depressed most days always had an excuse to back his depression … main reason debts I helped him get out of debt but only realised he was getting himself in debt because of his addiction.
Compulsive liar … hate his guts .. luckily I don’t live with him no more and I’m doing soo well .
Sorry for banging on about myself but cut the story short you need to dig more deeper in to your partner and to find out how long he has been using and how much he is using and is he willing to get help . There is help out there for users but it all comes down to them willing to accept that help .
Many users don’t take the help and that’s where it just gets worse and you will also get dragged down with it.
Good luck
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Oh just to add to that my partner also has alcohol and drug addiction both . Recently he is showing me he has stopped and that’s all just to win me back again . But I know he will go back to it , I’m done with the abuse from him
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It sounds as though the coke is a symptom of his mental health issues. He needs to be referred by his GP for help with that first before he tries to stop drugs
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Hi Don,
I’m sorry to read of your partner’s addiction and the affect it is having on you. If you would like to have some help for yourself you may like to contact us at Icarus Trust. We are a charity that provides support for people in your situation and we could put you in touch with one of our trained and experienced people. Talking to them might help you and they would also let you know what else is available to you.
You can contact Icarus Trust on help@icarustrust.org or visit our website http://www.icarustrust.org
Good luck.
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