[wagtail]

Hi again and thank you to all who responded to my last posts.

My son has been in communication with me today said he’s scared to come, hasn’t showered for a week and still has the same clothes on from a week ago! This is not my 38 year old ex royal marine that I know

He has also implied that he is suicidal, he is coming down from a week of cocaine but how do we deal with this?

Any thoughts gratefully received I know if he’s going to do it he will and I will provide support but the dilemma is ‘tough love’ support vs gentle approach to support his come down after a week of cocaine …

[lindyloo]

Hi Wagtail, I am so sorry that you have this dilemma to deal with.

If you read Danman83 thread he has lots of advice and support as a person in recovery.

Perhaps the Icarus trust could advise you too, I believe they have counselling services.

My 28yr son also has alcohol and cocaine addictions, so I understand the rollercoaster of emotions that goes with it.

My son has recently relapsed after almost 6 months clean. He was honest with us, and told us he’s drinking again to help him ‘cope’.

Its easy to get angry and frustrated but I told him I still love him. Told him we’re here for him but not to settle his debts.

I help with cigs and food and text him or phone regularly. But ultimately I guess its down to their choices that they make, to get support and help. It’s heartbreaking as you feel you can’t switch off. I feel now, that the ball is in his court and I can’t do anymore than I’m doing at the moment. My health and well-being would suffer if I got too involved.

I know after a comedown they are very tired and when they’re not sleeping they’re very hungry. Its better that they don’t mistake hunger pangs for drug cravings. Just keep him fed and hydrated for the moment and he’ll sleep it off for a few days. That’s my experience anyway, I guess everyone handles different situations according to the needs at the time, especially if he has suicidal thoughts, I’d seek professional advice.

Remember to take care of you too.

Keep in touch on this forum.

Lx

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