Hi I’m sorry to hear you are going through this.
you can join co-anon support for family members or partners of addicts. you can join the zoom meetings 5 days a week.
You can do ur own 12 step recovery and get a sponsor for yourself. You will learn to focus on you and stop enabling etc whether or not you chose to stay together. It may give you some strength talking to other women in your situation.
good luck
Xxx