[jj11]

Hi lovely people,

I am just throwing a question out there ….. do you find your significant others who are addicts do everything to excess???

Love to excess then discard ?

Over focus on a topic/likes/dreams?

Talk about all the great things they have done and achievements ?

Talk about how great everyone else is?

Basically drag you into their world of excess?

I think the reason I am struggling with leaving my ex addict (alcohol and cocaine) is because of how he manipulated me into thinking “I was his one”! When really he was using me as an enabler ????

[pops88]

Can someone please help me my husband left me and 2 kids 11 weeks ago, I discovered he is a cocaine addict, he acts so normal and happy as if he has done nothing wrong , he is doing all the stuff he hated drinking in bars , not bothering with me or the children, will he ever snap out of it , ? I think he is really hard on it for about a year, starting acting really different from dec, I think he thought I was going to catch him, we where best friends and did everything together, he is so cocky and acts funny and sings when we see him the odd time , ???? I knew something was wrong but didn’t know it was cocaine, he lies and denies everything,

[paw_x]

I am so sorry for what you are going through Pops. The best advice anyone can give you right now is to focus on you and the kids right now. Your husband sounds like he’s in denial and keeping up the act – let him. You can’t force someone into recovery, they have to have acknowledged that they have a problem and to want the help to deal with it. I realise that is hard to accept, but you can’t control an addict’s behaviour, as much as we would all love to! Dealing with a loved one with addiction can take everything from you and you need to focus on what makes you and the kids happy, what will keep you sane during this time, etc. For me it’s been upping my gym routine massively, doing self care, and getting out and about in the sunshine.

Look after yourself x

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