[lsalina1975]

Hello I am eli

I am living with an ex-drug addict for 9 months, he has been clean for 2 years, but he has been a user of all kinds of drugs that you can imagine especially methamphetamine, sometimes it feels distant as if his body was there but his mind was not or no feelings at all, other times he is so angry that he doesn’t want to speak.

I am very sensitive and that kind of behavior kills me because I don’t know how I should help him or what I should do, I don’t know if he is using or manipulating me.

I would like people who have had experience with ex-drug addicts to tell me which behaviors are normal and which are not.

Can they have true feelings of love and concern for someone?

Thanks

[kel1]

That could be a number of substances to be fair, especially Ketamin as it’s a disassociate drug. Could be crack as it impairs reality or hullucinates. It’s hard to pinpoint just by what you say as to what substance he could be using as it’s not really enough information.

People on drugs are selfish and have little feelings for others. I know that’s harsh but that’s the truth. Addiction consumes people and sadly that’s why places like this exist because families and relationships suffer tremendously.

From experience id say protect yourself and focus on you. Nothing you do will ever change his behaviors, however if you change how you react then things might get better.

Drugs and Alcohol destroys lives. Like I said families and the addict.

[lsalina1975]

Thanks Kel1

I don’t believe he is currently doing drugs anymore, I am not 100% sure, but He spend more of his time working or with me, but my concern is about what the drug left behind of him

I appreciate your words about: “Nothing you do will ever change his behaviors, however if you change how you react then things might get better. ”

This was part of my concern I let myself go to deep before I notice.

Thanks

[kel1]

If he isn’t using drugs then perhaps he is experiencing depression? Working lots is usually a sign, along with mood swings. Maybe he could go see his GP.

Yeh id suggest you focus on you and don’t get to involved in that madness, especially if it is drugs.

[lsalina1975]

When the work turn hard for him to do it, we go into depression, He’s working normal hours.

You know what is hard for me, is my first time with somebody that was addict and tried to commit suicide and I don’t know is he is going back or not, is a lot of unknowns…

I think be patient is going to help…

Maybe

[kel1]

It’s impossible to live with an addict and be at peace. It’s hell, pure HELL. Could be using if he is having mood swings. If he isn’t being honest then you will never know unless you become like I did – suspicious etc which is awful. I finally found evidence and busted him. Addicts lie lie lie so unless you bust him or drug test him you probably won’t know for sure.

He needs help tho especially with suicidal ideation. Definitely needs see his GP

[fitz1991]

Hi!

I see this was posted back in May – is your situation still as it was?

I’m soo glad I found your post though, as I am going through a very similar situation & searching for answers.

My partner is only 2 months out of detox atm though. About the same time we got back together after a 2 year separation. It started off with lots of golden hopes and dreams, promises and honesty, adoration and love. 3 weeks after we we got back together and things started to fall apart.

He’s distant, makes very little effort. We aren’t physically intimate but that’s ok for now – it’s the emotional intimacy that has really diminished, and I’m tired of being the only trying…

He’s so defensive when I bring it up though, and says I’m reading too much into his behaviours right now. It’s exhausting. But now we are at breaking point – if not past it and it’s heart breaking.

If you managed to overcome your situation or it got better, please advise how…

Wishing you all the best!! X

[Author]

Posts