[feellikegivingup]

My daughter is nearly 7 years old. She lives with me (her mum), step dad (whose been in her life since she was 1), younger brother who is 3 and little dog.

Her dad has her 1 night a week (midweek) and says he can’t help anymore than that cos he’s a DJ and lives in a 1 bedroom flat with his girlfriend.

My daughter is a nightmare. She tells us she wants us dead, gonna get a kitchen knife and stab us, calls us fat and much more. She physically hurts us, pinching, scratching, grabbing, biting, kicking and spitting.

She started acting up around when our son was born, she sat on his head, bite his finger but we knew it was jealously and how things had changed so we did our all time best to make sure she wasn’t left out, got her involved with helping, had days and activities that were just for her and never made her feel left out.

She then started school and at first it was really good because she’s very clever and it was challenging her and keeping her occupied. Now she’s disruptive, is really unkind to other kids and sometimes is even disrespectful towards staff.

We’ve all discovered any attention is good attention to her so we do all we can to ignore/dismiss the silly negative things and when she is naughty she gets 1 warning then it’s time out and then sent to bed if it continues.

She’s very demanding and acts like a spoilt brat (though we’ve never overspoilt the kids). She lacks empathy and doesn’t care about anyone other than herself.

Then it’s like a vicious circle with her, she behaves really well, we over praise and shower her with love and then if it continues gets a reward but as soon as she’s had it she’s evil again.

The one night a week we get a break from her is so lovely and we feel like we recharge our batteries ready to go but it’s hard to stay positive and keep going when she’s the reason we are so miserable. I know it sounds awful to say that but we are all suffering and fear our youngest is picking up on this behavior and we cannot have that.

Before anyone asks I’ve attended parenting courses, approached the doctors but they said a referral would be virtually impossible, I’ve contact social services myself and we had a support worker see us for 7 weeks but that was it and had a charity funded home support company visit us once a week but it feels like everyone is repeating everything we have already tried.

We feel like we don’t know what to do anymore and sometimes feel that she would be better in care (I know that sounds awful to say as a parent but when things are extremely difficult you feel it might be your only choice).

Any help, advice or even someone who has been there would be much appreciated. Some positivity and some direct would be really helpful.

Thanks in advance.

[2468]

Please don’t feel bad about saying u would be better off if she went away as a parent of a child who all his life he has been trouble and still is aged 30 I wish bad things and feel so guilty but until u in the situation you have no idea how low you can get. I feel for you because iv always tried my best and I just don’t want it anymore. Like u I love my son but wish I could walk away.

[feellikegivingup]

Thank you for replying.

I can’t imagine how you feel I’ve only had 7 years of it and feel like I’m at my wits end! Problem is it brings the whole household down as she hurts everyone and its not fair. My husband chooses to deal with it but he always says she is his daughter but my son and our dog don’t deserve it and it’s not fair on them. She needs serious help but we get the same bull**it, be consistent, stay at it, ignore the bad praise the good, talk to them like we have tried everything you could possibly imagine and don’t them for a consistent about of time for them to have an affect and it doesn’t or it works for so long then one day doesn’t…

[Author]

Posts