[triggerd20]

I’ll try an keep this simple, my partner of 6 years is and admits to being an alcoholic he can drink up to 5 half bottles of vodka a day he drinks it straight and can pretty much down it in one, back in the begining of 2015 his dad died suddenly and in sad circumstances, then 6 months later we lost our son he was stillborn at 37 weeks, the drinking began then and was well hidden, then in 2016 we had another son that was born with liver failure, heart condition and a kidney condition, he’s had 1 liver op and 3 open heart surgeries anyway our son is amazing and we are very lucky to have him, however the drink is worse than ever, I’ve been to meeting with him, had counciling with him, had the mental health team involved, heard every excuse you could think of, he sneaks off to drink or even worse hides it in my house knowing that if our son was to have a single drop it would kill him, I really have tried to help him and been there, supported him in every way possible, I’m now at the point where my son won’t go near him because he’s always shouting when he’s drinking, there has never been any physical violence but a lot of verbal, social services have been involved as once I went out to the bins andhe locked the door on me and refused to open it with my son inside, so yet again after a 5 day binge, he wants help again, problem is I don’t think I’ve got anything left in me to help him, we have been told that our son will need a liver transplant when he’s older, I can’t deal with the fact his dad could be the only match to help him when the time comes and his liver will be a mess, I hope this makes sense, I don’t really know why I’m posting this to be honest, I just feel so alone and tired, if you have got to this sentence well done because even I’m finding it tough to read back x

[foxy]

Hi there,

Sorry to hear about what you’ve been going through. I just wanted to let you know that I know what it’s like to feel like you’re fighting a losing battle and that you’re not alone.

My situation is different to yours but my husband’s drinking has affected me and my family too.After years of drinking and health problems because of his drinking ,he finally admitted he had a problem and the doctor referred him to a drug and alcohol centre. I thought I was fighting a losing battle but this was finally a turning point.There’s been lots of ups and downs and there’s no quick fixes but I am beginning to feel more hopeful after his second detox but even now some days are overwhelming, even though he’s now stopped drinking.

Anyway ,I just wanted to let you know that I understand how hard it is when someone you love struggles with alcohol. My husbands dad died in 2001 and his younger sister ten years ago ,so I think that’s how his drinking changed from being social to being something he needed every day.

I don’t know all the answers and I’ve only just joined the forum myself but it’s good to be able to share our struggles together.Hope your partner gets the help he needs and that you’ll be ok too

[triggerd20]

Thank you for taking the time to reply to me, we’ve been down the alcohol misuse referral road so many times now, I have had to give up my job due to coronavirus as I was a key worker, I trusted my partner to look after our 3 year old who is shielding, my partner seemed to have stopped drinking and had for a while or so I thought, I now feel so stupid and blind to the fact I didn’t see it, until I came home from work and caught him red handed with a bottle of vodka on the side in the kitchen and my son playing alone in the garden, I do understand how hard this is, but I can’t help feeling that I’m putting my partner and his addiction before the saftey of my very much loved boy, I just don’t feel I can help him anymore but when I try and tell him this he just cries and says he needs us or he might as well be dead if we arnt around, as you kmow it’s emotionally and mentally draining and I’m so low, In loads of debt and literally a single parent with a lodger that eats all the food and doesn’t help with any bills.

I’m so happy your starting to feel a bit better about things, death seems to be a really hard thing for men to cope with, my partner seems to forget that we both lost our son and thinks that it only happened to him, thank you once again for replying and I hope your partner stays on the road to recovery x

[robb]

All the best to your little boy & sorry to hear your story.

Am currently living with a female alcohol dependent partner, at her worse time She was drinking up to 2 litres of vodka per day.

Due to over a decade of drinking she has liver and kidney damage, pancreatitis, she lost a lot of weight, and now suffers pain each day as her muscles regrow back into her skin. Its a hard road to walk beside some one you love destroy them self’s. we also lost unborn children a few times in our relationship, it’s never been easy.

Wish people could see what they could end up in hospital like, I spent a few months by my partner side in ICU and it’s not pretty.

We are all here to talk if you need people to talk too.

[foxy]

It definitely is mentally and emotionally challenging. That’s why I recently joined the group too.

My heart goes out to you and your little boy. You sound amazing, being so supportive but you need support too .You’ve both been through alot !

We ended up in debt a while ago and I ended up taking his bank cards off him.I felt bad because it was like I was an adult treating him as a child but it did help in the long run.I really don’t know how I got through it all before he eventually got some help,but I did and I hope that whatever happens you and your little boy come through this ok .Are there any support groups in your area or friends and family who can support you emotionally?

[Author]

Posts