[sadmum22]

I’m heartbroken. My 25 year old son has been battling cocaine addiction for a couple of years now. His father has bailed him out for thousands, something I refuse to do (we are divorced).

Recently I’ve found I’ve had to detach myself from my son to preserve my own sanity, this resulted in me asking him to leave our family home because I didn’t want the stress and anxiety anymore (mood swings, threats from dealers). This in itself has gutted me – my mother kicked me out at 16 and I vowed never to do that to one of my children.

He’s had a bad relapse (he’s previously refused to seek help through GP) and now his nose is crumbling, he’s paranoid, his mental health is seriously worrying. He says he wants help, as he’s realising he’s lost everything (job, money, family, looks, health), so rang his GP who just gave him the number for turning point, without even seeing him face to face.

I’m worried sick, always bursting into tears randomly, knowing he’s hungry, sitting in his house with no electric… it’s breaking my heart.

Research shows me that rehab in my area is poor. Does anyone have experience of Turning Point? Will they be able to help him? I’m frightened he’s going to die 🙁

[deemarie]

Hi there . I am sorry you going through this .I am also going through the same , my son is 30, my only child and I have nightmares every night about him with worries .

My son was a show off but one of the sweetest kindest handsome lads you could ever meet. He also very clever and a plumber who has lost his job over and over. He got involved with some rather nasty people.

He started with those legal highs at a young age, then cannabis and now just over 2years ago was introduced to crack cocaine and i suspect herion and now is addicted, my heart is broken as i cant do any more to help him . My husband ( not his father) have bailed him out so many times costing us in the region is 20 thousand pounds plus plus . And he constantly promised us he would change and make better choices . We were even blackmail into giving his dealers money that he allegedly owed and promised to pay us back that hasnt happened My mental health took a major down fall, still has . He would call, text saying he had no food money, rent, fuel, ect ect . Making me feel such tremendous guilt. I am was a professional person working in the medical industry, I have seeked support from a drug services that supported families, unfortunately this wasn’ t helpful for me. However I understand it can be for others, maybe there a service in your area that could support you. GPS are totally useless!!!! they also just gave my son a number too and showed no interest in supporting him . My son nonlonger has interest in drug services support, ie he not ready for thier support , he tried them but found them not suitable for him .

The final straw for us , was financially we can no longer support him or should I say enable him. we are now pensioners, my son would take the last pound from me just so that he could get his next fix he didnt care if we had nothing left or if we would go hungry , this is when I realised that I just couldn’t help him anymore he doesn’t care but only for his drugs . My son is gone and he now has to find a way out of this drug hell he is in .

With regards to your son being hungry.. instead of giving him money I used to buy my son a weeks worth of food then I discovered that he never ate the food as I would find it rotten in his flat . Tell your son to go to a food bank if he hungry that’s what I did and give him the address of your nearest one . Heat and warmth well he has his flat , better cold there than in the streets . I have to remind myself that my son makes his own choices and I can’t influence that anymore as hes a grown man now . I will always love my son but I have to protect my own health and my marriage i have more years behind me than in front. I pray that my son see the light and gets well. but in the meantime,, I

recently had to block him from my life . I told him that I will alway love the beautiful boy I remember with out drugs and and until he returns, it is just too painful for me to watch my son ruin his life, it just far to painful . Good luck to you .

[fed-up-mom]

Hi I too have a drug addicted son. He has bled me dry for money for years. I have recently cut him off. I am semi retired and have 3 kids all grown up. He being my youngest is 32 years old. He knocks me up in the middle of the night demanding money. Also lies saying no food or petrol. 2 weeks ago over the course of the previous month he borrowed 600 pound for food and all bills. He promised me he would give me some back out of his dole. Dole day he said he needed it more than me. He then tried to knock me up at 2.30 in the morning on my pay day.  Until they want help truly I think you have got to stop enabling. My son has cried says he will stop. Then conned me out of money again and again. For pur own sakes we have to say no more. But it hurts badly

[Princess]

Hi. Another mum of a drug addicted son here. My son is 26 and I have become his carer. It does hurt a lot when all they do is take but not give. After 10 years this has become my lot and I can’t see that anything will change until one of us dies.

[Janie13]

Hi my 27 year old daughter is on cocaine, alcohol and other tablets.
I want walk away I would if it was not for my 12 year grandson, your properly doing the maths ,yes she was 15 when she had her son .
I have had 12 years old hell,my grandson who has learning disabilities is brainwashed now and hates me ,but i will still try and have him rather than he go into care.
The start of any sort of recovery is they have to admit they addicts, my daughter wont,and usually they have to try help in the community first going to meetings everyday, its not easy getting into rehap unless you pay private which is not much short of £1000 a week (yes a week )
In my experience of rehap only a handful of people make it ,i heard of endless deaths of those who left us after completing there 3,6,9 months with us.
I lost a partner to alcohol .
My daughter too has drained me of money
She wont talk to me now because i spoke to her social worker.drugs make them paranoid completely destroy the brain.

[Author]

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