Hi Joanna,
It sounds really tough what you are going through. I’m so sorry that you are having to deal with so much scary stuff trying to support your son.
If you would like to talk with someone who would understand how you are feeling and what you are going through please contact us at The Icarus Trust.
We are a charity that supports people dealing with the addictions of a person close to them. We have a team of very experienced trained people and if you contact us you could be put in touch with one of them. They would listen and try to help.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website http://www.icarustrust.org
I hope all goes well for you and your son.