[sc0722]

I am in my late 20s and always dabbled with coke since the age of about 17 onwards. I met my boyfriend (now husband) in 2012 and stopped everything for years. I then moved and my new neighbours knew alot of people who took coke.

So it all went wrong from there. I had started to log every time i did it, was like once every 3 months. But its now got to a point where its at least once a month i am doing it with these people and i cant carry on like this.

My partner doesnt know anything. He is the kindest person and it would destroy him. Ive kept it to myself for years.

Ive blocked/deleted numbers but it still doesnt seem to stop me and i got triggered this weekend which then turned into a full night binge!

Im just at the point where i want to hide away and never leave my house again.

Any advice would be appreciated x

[willbebetter123]

Try to avoid drinking alcohol when possible, there’s something about drinking that makes the body crave cocaine obsessively. Well it does to me anyway.

[kulstar]

Hi SCO722

I feel your pain. As Willbebetter has said, Alcohol is partly your downfall but more than it’s your mindset. Once the seed of coke is planted in the very nature of our being it’s very difficult to let go of.

Just as your noting how often you do it which is great think about life free of any substance abuse (including alcohol). Start at the end with the perfect you and work backwards as to how you want to achieve this.

Alcohol or any substance abuse inhibits our growth whether we like it or not. It takes up space within our lives, whether it be looking forward to that first drink or that first line, that’s all your mind gets consumed with. Think about the space you’d have to grow without these things in your life. What else could you do with the time available? Rediscover old hobbies, discover new ones possibly? This isn’t the time to create a definitive list and action it immediately but have faith in the process.

I wasted so much of the last few years counting down the days before I could effed up that I forgot how to live for the moment. Before I knew it I was getting effed up everyday. I’m not saying your here yet but life has a way of springing these things up on you.

Sacrifice the joys you think you’ll have today for a better tomorrow. Before you know it, they weren’t sacrifices at all but mere traps.

[sc0722]

Thank you for your advice. I have been clean now for a few months and feeling good! I think the last time was just a big wake up call for me ????

[Author]

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