[missm]

My son is 19. He began smoking cannabis at 15 and it went downhill from there. His behaviour became very irrational and very aggressive if I didn’t ‘enable’ him. He began lying and stealing. I lived on my own with him and had to have locks fitted on my bedroom door as a safe room. He would smash the house up and steal knives out of the kitchen drawer. It was terrifying. Eventually he was placed into semi independent living. He has been evicted more than 8 times in two years. The lying, emotional abuse, and physical threats have got worse. My son knows that I love him dearly but I am so scared of him I can’t see him on my own anymore. He is now homeless and addicted to all sorts of drugs (bar crack and heroin) I have tried supporting him for meetings with drug counselling, the mental health team but he is not interested. Other agencies have tried to help him with housing but without success. He will ring me and tell me he needs to see me as he feels suicidal, I will go and see him and then he will use the opportunity to get money from me. I have been trapped in the car for hours before with him refusing to leave until I give him money. I cannot bear to see him like this and do not recognise him anymore. How can I support him in this situation?

[danman83]

Are u sure hes doing all this for cannabis? There sounds abit more to it to me

[missm]

No, it started off with the cannabis. He has moved on to other drugs. He has underlying mental health and it has escalated. Support is being offered but it seems like he is in denial that there is a problem.

[danman83]

I always say this in these situations. Your in a real hard situation.. hes your son.. there no greater love than the love for your child.

And from what you have said hes making your life hell. No son should make you that scared you have to lock yourself in the room. He should be protecting you if anything.

Does he want to quit the drugs?

Your asking how can you support him?

I really dont know in these situations.

Some people say. Leave him to it.. he will have to learn for himself.. then if anythimg happens you will blame yourself.

Or u can let him back and say. No drugs you sort your self and thats it or your on the streets again.. which you probably know he will be the same again.

Id probably support him.. by making sure his staying somewere or got warm clothes. And buy some food for him..dont give him money.

What do you want to do?

Is he your only child?

[dnanon]

Hi MissM, all I can suggest is that you let him know that you are there for emotional support but not financial support any more. I know it must be heartbreaking to see your son like this. Be strong xx

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