[pandapanda]

My partner has recently relapsed into a cocaine addiction. He’d been to rehab about ten years ago (before we were together) and had had a few minor relapses since but nothing that lasted more than a day. He’s now been fully back in the throes of it- smoking it as previous nose surgery for addiction means he can’t snort it. He’d been going to NA the last few days and seemed to be doing better and told me it was all gone. I’ve just found a pipe hidden in the bathroom and confronted him and he’s stormed out. I really can’t tell anyone. I have a pretty high profile job and from the outside our life looks great. I’m sat on a work call now with camera off crying as I write this. What do I do?

[jubbyj]

Im so sorry you’re going through this…I can relate to everything unfortunately. My fiancé needs to have that nose surgery but since he is still using he does not qualify. He smokes it as well though. I think its so unfair that  they “storm off” or take out their anger on us when we have the right to be angry about what we found or our suspicions. He is just taking the attention off of him and hoping you beg for him to come home. Anyways, I don’t blame you for not wanting to tell anyone. Having a partner who is an addict is embarrassing and I get it. I think the most you can do right now is try to get him while he’s sober and have a chat with him about what is going on and set some boundaries. If he has no ambition to stop, I would leave, at least short term. Ive been dealing with it for five years and I can’t begin to tell you how fucked its gotten my head. Honestly put yourself first. You can’t help him. He will get help when he’s ready and realizes you’re seriously not going to put up with this. I wish I set my boundaries at the beginning of his addiction 🙁 If you have a close friend you can trust reach out. This is my first time on here but I’m willing to chat also, although there is no light at the end of the tunnel until you leave 🙁

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