[jopdm123]

Hi Tazzer,

I am speaking from experience here. 10 years ago I was in a relationship with a guy who was 13 years older than me. (I was the same age as your daughter now) He drank, took drugs etc. He was a lovely guy when sober but he abused me physically and mentally for years. He manipulated me and made me feel sorry for him. I left time and time again but always went back. I hid it from my parents and distanced myself from them despite them being my best friends and being extremely close. I know Dee down my parents knew, as I would turn back up on the door step with a broken nose and black eyes. I went through it for years before I finally build up the courage to say enough is enough, that was a few years later. She needs to find confidence in herself and it will come in her own time. I never listened to my parents and only left when I was ready. He would tell me ‘ I will kill myself if you leave’ that was hard as it made me stay. Later on When I left he did subsequently kill himself but that was his demons not me (his family blamed me of course). Give her time, reassure her you are there for her and be there to pick her up.

I know every situation is different.

[Author]

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