[dre80]

I have read several of you and am anesthetized.

I met him 3 months ago, the second time he was at my house, he spoke of the dysfunctional family, alcoholic brother, rich but uncontrolled parents, that his uncles say that him and his brothers’ harm was that they had been given everything, spoiled.

He said he was trying to quit something, that he had erased the guy’s phone, and I asked: I use powder … cocaine, 5 years now, he has 40.

When we slept, I noticed that he has spasms in his arms, legs, head, that he breathes really bad and that he has too much nose and a lot of throat discharge.

He is very loving, too polite, he talks too much about himself, the things he knows about me, I wanted to tell.  Whenever we saw each other at my house, I insisted that he go there, I went to his house once when his brother was out, but he introduced me to his brother one day.  He told his mom about me, they are from another city, she said she didn’t have faith.  The aunt also saw us together.

In these 3 months, several problems at work, because he always tired, forgotten, disorganized.  He gave me sexual disease  (tricho) of some girl who stayed months before, I did and paid for the treatment for both of us, now only with protection. I’m having a lot of patience as he always says. He has only dated 2 women until today and was many years ago, like 10 (I believe that before cocaine), he has no serious relationship till now.  I talked but did not impose, if it is.  He was to a doctor and takes 2 Amato and Desve drugs, but it hasn’t been therapy yet.  He did this because a partner bought the medicine because he had no money.  He receives an allowance from his father (he’s 40), the family doesn’t know anything.  Once driving mad at having offended a woman in a bank, as he is not aggressive, he was scared that the cocaine was changing him, he told me he had been using it for 7 years, not 5 years as before.  He should use it for 10 years even more maybe.  Partner pressed, he went a doctor, but I don’t think he wants to, he just says he wants to, but I don’t think it’s true.  He sleeps too much, doesn’t like to go out, tried the walks I suggested.  He already suggested that he will hurt me because it is a strong addiction, and he doesn’t want to date, but till now he has acted as a boyfriend and we talked about it.  I have only supported him, but I saw that he becomes very selfish, he just talks about him, he doesn’t lie about what he told me ultil now, I checked everything, the company also, medicines too, I think he just lies about years of use and frequency (twice a week), to deceive himself.  Because if he sits on the couch, he turns off!  And he didn’t opened the company one day, slept and they fought a lot with him, so he took the medicine.  He already had that hallucination of insects coming out of his nose and in my house, insects in him.  I warned him of all this.  Apparently now he is using heavy because stress at work, has used lsd, ecstasy, lolo … and marijuana.  I am afraid of him using crack together, because if he already uses it many days a week and leaves him exhausted and already a little irritated by the initial effect of the medications, crack is cheap helps cocaine effect.  Are they all going to crack?  And in his room there is no TV, just the wires, in the rest of the house there is.  It must have sold for drugs.  And use all the money that his father give… ro cocaine. Because he says there are bill collectors calling him, and cell phone hasn’t paid the bill yet!  And he wants to get away from me … because he wants a commitment to cocaine, he says it is not fair to me because he is always tired, and in sex he makes a huge effort, because I insist.  He will not get out of this right?  And now?  Everyone tells me to walk away from him while there is time.  He does not lie, he is mistaken in the use, but he is polite etc.  Will everyone be aggressive, and liars?  So far I have not seen lies with me, I never saw someone using and how they are during effects and after.  He doesn’t have another person because he can’t even have one haha.  He has emotional dullness and he already said that he likes the space alone in his house.  Worst phase he must have ever had and he knew me.  I am from the health area, same age.

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