Hi Naomi
Welcome to the forum. No one will judge you here, in fact I think you should be very proud of yourself for admitting you have a problem with addiction and want to stop.
Everyone here has a loved one with addiction or is a person in recovery. Read the other threads here.
I think you have made a decision that you are powerless to your addiction and this is the first step towards recovery.
There is advice and support on the forum homepage and also from the Icarus trust.
My son has alcohol and cocaine addictions for 10yrs. He reached out fir support last year. He attended AA, CA and NA meetings, he met like minded people who all support each other. Its been tough for him and he’s relapsed, but for the moment he’s doing really well, clean for almost a month.
Its not too late for you Naomi you have your whole life in front of you.
Be strong, have faith and seek the help you need.
Always here to chat ,
Lx