- This topic has 3 replies, 2 voices, and was last updated 5 years ago by cassidy1989.
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August 10, 2019 at 8:31 am #5439truleeParticipant
Honestly, typing this out to a community is frightening.
I lost my mom very young, her death
has caused a lot of pain emotional,
but as I grow older my stability is
always a struggle.
I’m resilient and I have found my way but I have hade to rely on others heavily. Im only 21 I have been my own parent for awhile now and have had to make decisions that no young adult should on their own.
I don’t have much family and have had to rely on my bf & his mother for some time. I’m grateful for the help, but he has his own emotional trauma that has changed our relationship for the worst. nasty fights, broken trust, & drugs.
Things are calm now but he will bring things back from the past and it triggers me badly. His mother has her own trauma as well and at times projects and this creates issues that aren’t there.
I’m trying to finish school and save to move out, I go to therapy as well but my therapist and others make it seem like it’s so easy to just leave which makes me feel terrible inside. Like I’m my worst enemy or let alone an enabler to myself & his family.
I love him, and at times I see a beautiful future bcs he is also seeking help, but then it all comes crashing down. I’m numb and just trying to survive at this point.
I’m not looking for pity, just desperate for advice.
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August 10, 2019 at 9:25 am #13986cassidy1989Participant
Hi trruelee you have been through so much. It’s great that you are reaching out for support as it sounds like therapists have not been helpful even detrimental. I love that you recognise that you do have great resilience but at times it gets too much to bear you also sound like you see the best in others and are hopeful. I think it sounds like a good idea moving out as it sounds like you are getting a lot if your bf and his mums trauma projected at you. What are you studying?
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August 10, 2019 at 12:16 pm #13990cassidy1989Participant
Hi I thought it was psychology as you have great awareness. It’s not crazy in my opinion anybody working in the mental health field who has lots of life experience are very genuine and empathic. I am an addiction worker and I have had my own addiction and really poor mental health at times. You said you are looking for advice. I’m happy to chat with you. I think it often helps to talk with someone who is neutral to the situation. Cass
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