[stillhopeful2019]

So I posted on here a few weeks ago having left my husband who had a alcohol and cocaine addiction. He has been remorseful and said he is really trying to kick this habit. I know he has had relapses, most recent at a family wedding where he claims his friend was having a line and encouraged him to have it as it wasnt that strong and no one would notice. He said he didnt want to but seeing it in front of him, he was weak and now regrets it. He said he hates the stuff and thats something he has never said. He is living alone, doing all the necessary household chores, managing his own finances, keeping his head down, visiting family, watching netflix, sleeping early but I think he still struggles when he gets paid as he has the finances and has even admitted when he has money he gets tempted to buy alcohol and cocaine. His next salary is due this weekend and that will be a testing time. It’s like he is trying but has weak moments. I guess my question is whether based on the way he appears to be trying, is that a good sign as I am hoping he does kick the habit and we can be a family again but I have told him I need to see progress. I have pointed him to many resources and he says he will look into them. At first he was saying he will be able to kick the habit by himself but then when he admitted to relapses I questioned whether he was fooling himself and this addiction is stronger than he thinks it is. He agreed and for the first time ever, he actually said I need help to fight these urges, he also called them cravings. Then there was a family wedding which he was heavily involved with so I allowed him that time before he seeks help. Now wedding is over and he has said he is serious and will be looking into the stuff I sent. I know it should be him looking for the help but I dont think it’s a problem if I point him in the right direction and then let him take the necessary step, or is it? I can see he misses us terribly and has said on many occasions life is not good without me and the kids. I guess I want to be careful how I translate progress. He recognises it’s all in the mind and is trying to keep busy but then given the opportunity, he succumbs to it and then regrets it. Overall he isnt a bad person, he seems to know what he wants but doesnt know how to go about it. Some have said to me leave him to make his own discovery but seeing as we are on talking terms and i really want to help him, i do tend to own his problem and seek solutions or resources to help him. Is that harmful to his recovery? Should I step back? Thanks for reading. I am so glad I found this forum as I can see it from both sides and that helps x

[stillhopeful2019]

Anyone?

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