Hi WOH,
I’m so sorry to read your post and hear how isolated and alone you feel whilst having to cope with your partner’s drinking.
I work for a charity called The Icarus Trust. We are set up to offer support to people like yourselves, who are having to deal with the affects of a partner’s addictive behaviour. We know how hard this can be. If you feel it would be helpful, please contact us and we will put you in touch with one of our experienced trained volunteers who you could talk with. Maybe this would help you to find a way forward and not to feel so alone.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website http://www.icarustrust.org
Wishing you all the best.