[MichelleS]

<p style=”text-align: left;”>I have had to tell my 32 year old weed addiction(and I suspect cocaine and other such substances pills ketamin etc)son to go.</p>
I am at my wits end with him,he has been making bad life choices most of his life,he can’t seem to live a “normal live” without his drugs. Which he denies he is taking.

The smell of pungent skunk coming out of my little front room the other night (where he has been staying…again for the last month) in my small one bed flat which I thought I had got back to myself for the last year and was finally getting some kind of “quiet peaceful, no drama life together, he split with his year long girlfriend, ( she chucked him out) and was back on my doorstep black bin liners surrounding him.

I gave him the house rules,specifically I DO NOT want to smell that awful bad thought provoking (for me) of skunk in my little home.

So the night before last I woke up for a wee 1.45 in the morning to that awful smell and it hit me like a punch in the stomach. I called out to him “why can I smell weed!!!) The answer was “I don’t know mum” that’s another issue I have ,he is a constant liar who believes everything he says.

So I’ve told him to go and this morning I feel awful so sad that my only son will be back to sofa surfing and in with the wrong people.

I don’t know why I am writing this I’m so tired I’m going to try and go to sleep for a while.

If this has resonated with any one who has similar stories I feel for you. I know I have weeks of misery coming.

Feeling scared and lonely.

So many other things have happened with him mainly negative I can’t do it anymore my support is wearing thin.

To be continued….maybe.

[Annette54]

As a sister of an almost lifelong addict (drugs) younger brother,  who later took his life, and with a son who struggles with alcohol misuse – over 50 years of trauma, what I would says is this:  Look after #1 first, always, always.

The best possible thing is your son leaving.  This gives you more space and peace, which is essential to our mental health.  Our loved ones (and we still love them a bit, don’t we?) have to sort themselves out.  Some will end up homeless.  Unless they get professional help for their addiction, they’re likely to do everything and anything to continue using.  This is simply the end result of addiction: the booze/and or drugs have taken over and the need for the daily hit consumes them.   Addiction is very natural, because the substance replaces our natural dopamine and many can’t live without the fake dopamine.

There is help here, and on other forums.  Make sure you change your locks, hold your head high and reassure yourself that you did your best.  90% of the families I know have been affected by addiction, but most are too ashamed to talk about it.  I do: quietly, because it enables other people to share their worries.

You deserve peace, never forget that!

[Author]

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