Hi Pickles,
Thanks for posting. I’m sorry to hear how let down by your parents you feel. Its also hard for you that you may have to choose between your partner and your eldest. Do you have any one else that you can talk to?
You might like to contact The Icarus Trust as we are charity providing support to people who find themselves in similar situations to yourself. We have a team of Family Friends, one of whom could be assigned to you to listen and help you to find help.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website http://www.icarustrust.org
Good luck.