[abibby123]

First time posting here.

Living with a 20 yr old who has problems with alcohol.  It’s been a tough few years and I am constantly anxious when he is out.  Any ideas from anyone on how to cope?

[Louise1980]

Hi, im sorry i don’t have any advice for you but I’m in the same position with my 25 year old. He  can go all week with no alcohol, or maybe 1 drink a couple of evenings. But then the weekend comes and he can be out from Friday night to Sunday night and barely able to walk when he gets it. I worry about something bad happening while he’s out and in such a state. He’s even gotten home Monday morning and had to call in such, as well as going into work when he’s clearly not sober. He won’t admit there is a problem, just says he’s having fun which young people do. Would appreciate some advice also on how to cope and to help him.

 

[Paola66]

Hi both, my son is 21 and has a drink problem sometimes uses drugs too. He is currently managing to hold down a job and has been going to AA meetings for a few weeks. However, I don’t think this has been working for him. I recently read an article on The Guardian mentioning CBT therapy as a successful way to help addiction and we are looking into this. It is really hard and I am looking for other parents for support. However, I don’t feel that AlAnon is for me. He has also been to the local resilience and alchool service for an assessment but said the support worker spent one hour and a half talking to him rather than listen. Even if he has admitted he has a problem, he cannot stop himself.

[abibby123]

Hi both

thank you for replying.  It’s so tough isn’t it.  Some days I really do wonder why I had kids which makes me sound mean but I am so tired by this all.  I thought he was doing okay as there were no major crises, but now his drinking is slowly increasing again and he is now drinking after work.  I am so scared he’ll lose yet another job because he’ll get drunk and get into trouble or even worse.  I am dreading Christmas as I will spend the whole time on edge wondering if he will make a scene.  I don’t want to sound ungrateful as I have a lot to be grateful for, but I just wish he would get some help.  He just thinks he can manage on his own and that he doesn’t have a problem.

I really wish that both of you are managing okay at the moment, and although I have no advice to give, I am sending support and wishes.

 

[abibby123]

Hi there.

I have also been told that CBT is good, my son has also been diagnosed with BPD.  He tried our local substance abuse centre but said the same thing… they just didn’t listen… so he walked out.  I have given him lists of AA meetings but he won’t go as he doesn’t think he has a problem… I spend my entire time being anxious even when I am at work.  If you want to chat please just message me and I would be happy to share my email address.  I hope this week goes okay for you.

 

[Author]

Posts