- This topic has 3 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 5 years, 10 months ago by mil1234.
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February 11, 2019 at 5:59 pm #5055my-addicted-motherParticipant
My mum has recently admitted that she has an alcohol problem and I’m not sure on where we go from here. She knows that she needs help and wants the help which is the most important aspect The only problem is that she does not want any outside help.
She keeps telling us that she “cannot do this” and we try to reassure her that she “can do this, maybe not right now”.
Is there anybody else going through a similar situation? I know that the journey for each person is different and things that work for one person may not necessarily work for another.
I have decided to begin a blog of her progress which will allow me to reflect on the progress she has made and maybe someday show her, if she wanted, everything we have been through as a family.
Feel free to have a look at https://addictedparents.wixsite.com/alcohol
I will try to write this blog once per week and will cover issues other than those related to alcohol to give a better understanding of the situation.
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February 12, 2019 at 5:50 pm #11288icarus-trustParticipant
Hi
I’m sorry to hear about your mum’s drinking and especially, when reading your blog, to see the reasons why she does. It must be frustrating for you to know that she accepts she needs help but won’t get any from outside. The blog is a great idea and I hope it will help your mum.
If you would like some support for yourself please contact us at The Icarus Trust. We are a charity that has a team of trained and experienced people who offer support to people who are affected by a friend or family member’s addiction. May be talking to one of them will help you.
You can contact us on help@icarustrust.org or visit the website http://www.icarustrust.org
Good luck. I hope everything gets better for you and your mum.
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February 12, 2019 at 5:52 pm #11289hoxParticipant
My sister has the same problem. When she has asked for help the doctors and councillor said she has no problem with the drink. She can lie and manipulate good.
After revealing to her husband that she drinks eighteen cans a day (This is not including the whisky that she drinks from a cup) she has finally said she has a problem. Her husband is now cutting her down. She has agreed to this and I hope that it works.
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February 21, 2019 at 2:46 pm #11375mil1234Participant
My mum has been going through mental health issues and addiction my entire life, i’m only 17 so it’s all I have known. I say this so you don’t feel as alone.
My mum has twice come SO SO close to death! From my personal experience when it comes to mental health or substance abuse the individual will not get better unless THEY want to. This was the hardest thing I ever learnt. Although, I want to make you feel better and there’s a huge list of what to say to make people feel better, I have to be honest with you.
One of the most important things ypu need to do although, you need be there for her and help her you alsp need to find a balance with looking agyer yourself! It’s difficult i got that balance wrong and even though I ended up in so much pain I got through it and im know at the stage I can to a degree talk about it and help others.
The biggest piece of advice i can give you although its not really advise is unless SHE wants it, she won’t get better. SHE has to be motivated and want it.
My mum went eventually to detox where her liver had failled got admitted to hospital over christmas from November 22nd to January 11th. She tried to discharge herself and nearly got sectioned. She ended up coming out and the went into rehab 5 days later where she again discharged herself for reasons not related to lack of motivation. She is doing better she has been sober for 91 days.
If you don’t mind me asking how old are you as I am pretty young (still in my first year of college.)
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