[clairebear8529]

Hi I don’t know what to do anymore my husband has been using cocaine but thinks I don’t know we have kids he also drinks a lot and in his words I have ruined his life. I go to work in the evenings and he is doing it at home while with the kids by himself will never admit it he can’t explain where money goes. I don’t know how to bring it up he always turns stuff round to me. Like the other night up a lot later than normal next night asleep before 7 I said you fell asleep early he said oh he she goes it’s ok for you but if I do I’m under investigation

[hje]

Hello, I firstly I want you to know you are not alone. Secondly they will always find a way to blame you, you are not the problem. I spent such a long time blaming myself for his behaviour questioning how I was acting when the truth is I was bending over backwards to make him happy. I have now accepted that the only person that can help him is himself although its difficult xxx

[kulstar]

Hi Clairebear

I was the same as your hubby. Sad truth is if he continues in this way he’ll have to suffer consequence for him to change. Very rarely will one just wake up and say that’s enough. What that consequence looks like I don’t know but you must remain steadfast in wanting a normal family life. This is what my wifey would say to me. She just wanted to do what normal families did, go out for dinner, have dinner at home at the same time, cuddles in bed, kiddies to stay at home with their Daddy and chill watch films etc while Mummy went out.

First step really is admission and acceptance of the mess they’re in and only then can you change. For some this never comes, for some when it does it really is a blessing from a higher force of nature that they must change

[Author]

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